A hard lesson.

Last week we went swimming at the YMCA with my mom. My mom always packs snacks for the girls during the swim breaks because swimming makes them hungry. I know it does. They are using up so much energy. Well I explained to my girls what time we would be leaving (at the next swim break) and that they wouldn’t be getting snacks that time because we were going to pick up some dinner and take it home.

So I get out of the pool early to go take stuff to the car, cool it down and get Jillian changed. The girls come up to me crying for a snack when they get out of the pool. I had already explained to them when and what time they would eat so this was totally unnecessary. Well nothing I said would stop them from crying. So I just kept saying the same thing. We went to Panda Express to pick up dinner and they cried to eat there. When I said no they cried to eat in the car in the parking lot. I said no. Veronica cried saying she didn’t understand. She cried while we were in the line at Panda Express picking out our food. She cried when we got back in the car and she had to smell that yummy food while we drove 45 mins home.

I know what you are thinking now. Why don’t you just feed the poor girls? She’s hungry. Well here’s the deal. She was upset….very upset and for no reason other then she was tired. I had told her exactly when she was going to eat and what she was going to eat (we have to handle Veronica that way) so I just needed her to calm down. I wouldn’t let her eat because I didn’t want her to be comforted by food. We all know what being comforted by food can do, trust me I wish it was a lesson I could have learned years ago. She was upset and yes feeding her would have stopped her crying, but I needed her to trust me and calm down on her own. I was going to feed her and she knew it, I just needed her to relax.

It was tough. I wanted to give in to her, but I knew starting this now would help her in the long run. I explained to her why I wasn’t feeding her and I let her know numerous times that I knew what was wrong. I acknowledged her problem and her fears and told her how I was going to handle them, but that I needed her to calm down on her own before she ate.

When we finally got home she ate and ate. She was calmer and we talked more about why I made her wait and why she was upset. We talked about the best way to handle those situations. I explained to her that I was not going to sit and eat with them because I was so nervous and I needed to calm down before I ate. After our talk she understood why I waited myself.

Sometimes it so hard being a mom, but I’m doing the best I can and I can only hope that later in life she understands and thanks for me it. I don’t want my children to have the struggles I have had in my life. We have since talked about it some more, she admitted she was just really tired. I talk to her about my struggles and can only hope that she doesn’t have the same ones.

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